Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
