Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
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