I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Randomize