there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
