He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
