have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
