I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
