Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
