There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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