My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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