i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
