But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
