I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
