Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I understand Curling. That high.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
