Is it normal to miss your booty call?
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
