Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
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