Non-Jews are for practice
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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