a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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