On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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