i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Randomize
