I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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