How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
