I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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