And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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