They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
this is an emotional support booty call
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
