don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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