She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
