Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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