I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
