i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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