He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize