I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
