I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
