her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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