Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
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