Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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