you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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