I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
