it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
my liver is dry heaving
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
