a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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