yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize