Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
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