You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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