I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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