We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
