genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Randomize
