im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
