just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
