Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
