I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
