You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
